What’s that Smell?

I read the other day that the Israelis are using “skunk spray” to disperse crowds of Muslim demonstrators who gather to throw rocks etc. at the Israelis gate guards. The skunk spray is a chemical mixture that, the observers say, smells somewhere between that of a dead body and human excrement. And it lingers over the area for some time. To me it seems odd that the skunk spray can disperse crowds of Muslims who spend most of their time in the intimate company of goats, but it works extremely well.

Another method that the Israelis use for crowd control is the one they employ to screen airline passengers. It intrigues me because it is remarkably inexpensive and amazingly effective. When was the last time you heard of an Israelis airline being bombed out of the sky?. They have no useless and expensive TSA fondlers who haven’t caught one terrorist in the thirteen years they have been strip searching grandmothers and six year old children. If you fly on an Israeli airline, the chances are that you will speed right through the checkpoint.

And that’s because they use observers who only choose to pull those from the check in line who appear to be possible terrorists. If the guy has a full beard, is wearing a turban, and carrying a prayer rug and a suspicious bag he’s not going to make it on the plane. Those are taken to a room where they are questioned, and either are allow to fly or are released back into the public. This procedure is quick, efficient, and obviously works. They don’t bother terrifying innocent children and grandmas like our highly inefficient TSA agents who’d have trouble securing a job as a security guard at the local septic plant.

Well, obviously we can’t employ these cheap and effective procedures that prove so useful to the Israelis because it violates “American values.” We can’t profile Muslims to keep them off our airlines, and we can’t use skunk spray to discourage those misfits who demonstrate to have taxpayers foot the bill for their tampons. “American values” began to deteriorate about the time Madeline Murray O’hare decided that her son shouldn’t have to hear the word “God” in school. And it’s been all downhill ever since. It reminds me of a line from an old song – “People walking around with blood in their eyes, and all she wants to do is dance.” I hate to sound like the TV evangelists, but it’s true – America better get right with God, or America is going down the poop shoot. The hand of God is on the flush handle even now.

About johnbeckmanbooks

John Beckman, a retired meteorologist, was known as “Johnny the Weatherman” in a career that spanned forty years. He forecasted the weather on WSJS-TV in Winston-Salem, NC, at WFGA-TV in Jacksonville, FL, and for thirty-three years in Atlanta at WSB-TV and WXIA-TV. Also a well published author Beckman now devotes full time to writing fiction. He currently has several eBooks on Amazon.com, "Tropical Knights," first in a series of adventure/mysteries about a sailor and his lovely CIA cohort on a mission to save America. Now available the sequel, and second in the series: "Tropical Daze." The third Jack & Amy adventure is "Tropical Rage" which became available on 30 April 2014. All of his books are highlighted on http://johnbeckmanbooks.com and available from Amazon.com. . .
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