Why oh why?

There are a lot of things I don’t understand. And since they don’t seem to bother anyone else it makes me think I’m crazy. For instance, my home is surrounded by 80 to 90 foot pines and hardwood trees. In the fall we have literally tons of leaves on the ground. Of course they are removed from the lawn, but most of my acre of land just has those leaves falling helter-skelter all over. And the soil never gets any higher. Matter can’t be destroyed, and it matters to me that leaves just disappear when left to their own devices.

Now, consider this. The world has been here for billions of years. I’ll concede that one leaf, when it rots won’t make much of a pile. BUT, since leaves have been falling for billions of years, and most of them are never removed – why are we not up to our eyeballs in leaf residue?

Another thing that bothers me is this: Perhaps people in other parts of America have better sense. But in the south why is EVERY possible connection to a highway named for some obscure politician? So we have the Billy Bob Frammuis Connector. The Sally Jane Fenster Overpass. The Oswald Pennywaist Bridge. The Freddie Stickplaster Interchange. The Oliver Cornoyster Passing Lane. Enough with the silly politician asphalt naming! It is bad enough we have these losers in some government office grafting us into bankruptcy; we don’t need their signs lining our highways!

It’s sad that we had a really lousy Super Bowl this year when the Seattle team appeared to be playing the Sharon High School Broncs, but do we have to have sideline beauties asking the same stupid questions of the coaches who give the same stupid answers?

Beauty: “Coach Snodgrass what do you have to do in the second half?

Snodgrass: “Shirley, we have to go out there and put some scores on the board.”

Beauty: “Your defensive line seems to be having some trouble stopping the quarterback.”

Snodgrass: “We’ve got our game face on and we came here to play. We just need to stick to the basics.”

I just wish some of those beauties would look at the coach one time and say, “No shit?”

If “know” is pronounced “no” why isn’t “now” pronounced “no” since “snow” is pronounced “sno?” And shouldn’t “cow” be pronounced “ko?” (Must be that darn umlaut thing.)

If we are supposed to love our neighbors, why do my neighbors have loud parties that keep me awake until 3AM? Don’t they love me enough to let me get some sleep?

When there is only one cashier and there are twelve people behind me and I have only one item to buy, why does the guy in front of me write a check for $2.43? So the cashier has page the manager who is on break, to come from across the street to authorize a check? Whatever happened to credit cards and cash?

Am I the only person in the world who seems to be totally ignorant on why these mysteries occur? Maybe I am just crazy.


About johnbeckmanbooks

John Beckman, a retired meteorologist, was known as “Johnny the Weatherman” in a career that spanned forty years. He forecasted the weather on WSJS-TV in Winston-Salem, NC, at WFGA-TV in Jacksonville, FL, and for thirty-three years in Atlanta at WSB-TV and WXIA-TV. Also a well published author Beckman now devotes full time to writing fiction. He currently has several eBooks on Amazon.com, "Tropical Knights," first in a series of adventure/mysteries about a sailor and his lovely CIA cohort on a mission to save America. Now available the sequel, and second in the series: "Tropical Daze." The third Jack & Amy adventure is "Tropical Rage" which became available on 30 April 2014. All of his books are highlighted on http://johnbeckmanbooks.com and available from Amazon.com. . .
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