There were 811 people who downloaded a free copy of “Tropical Knights” this past week. I hope you three who read this blog got yours (as in, “You’ll get yours!). Let’s do the math, people. 811 people downloaded it – but that doesn’t mean that 811 people will READ it. After all, as Arthur Godfrey used to say, “For free take, for buy, waste time.” So let us say half or 405 and ½ start reading it. Many of them won’t FINISH it. So perhaps half of them, 202 and ½ get through all 213 pages. Half of them won’t like it so that leaves 101 and ¼ who will think it is okay. Maybe not The Great Gatsby, but close to Honey Boo Boo goes to Vacation Bible School. But 101 (and ¼) won’t take time to review it on Amazon, which was the fucking purpose of the promotion in the first place, damn it! Oh….wait, I lost my temper there for a moment and I am a professional.
Okay, so lets say half of that number or 50 and almost ½ can leave Facebook and Twitter and texting while driving long enough to leave a review of the fine, outstanding and entertaining FREE book. that 50 will have an opportunity to rate Tropical Knights (you have to keep repeating the name a lot so it gets ingrained in peoples’ brains) from 5 Star to 1 Star. If half of them, or 25 and 1/3 rate it 5 Star and 25 and 1/3 rate it 1 Star that gives an average of 12 three-star reviews.
Since it already has 8 reviews that are 4 and 5 star reviews the 12 three-star reviews works out to be…aw, hell, I forgot where we were.
Can we start over?